So browsing afterelton.com, I came across an article. The icon is what drew me really. Next was the mention of a gay character on the show Everwood. A quick search on IMDB and I found an episode guide and the actor who played the character Kyle Hunter, a high school student hell bent on getting into Julliard. Not only is this kid seriously adorable, but his character plays piano. Jazz piano. Hot.
So a quick google on the name Steven R. McQueen didn’t yield much. But I torrented the entire 21 episodes of season 4. 7 of which he played a role in. Not much of an established character but the images of him swayed me to pursue it. So I had an Everwood binge today and I noticed something strange. Periodically throughout the various story plots, I found myself trying desperately not to cry. Many times in fact. But against my will, I shed a few tears here and there. Felt that all too familiar weight on my chest. The comfort of tissue. So much of it in fact that my nose actually started to bleed.
I don’t know if it was the show itself that started to stir these emotions in me or if it was just a catalyst that lit the fuse. Maybe this was remnants from Friday. Wii, Pudgy and I went to the gym. After we got out, we were walking back to my car and I mentioned that the film festival was coming soon. To which Wii responded, “So?” For some reason, that struck a nerve and I just gave up trying at all that night. I walked faster to my car leaving them both behind to talk amongst them selves. Much like I had done in the pool in fact.
I stayed quite and caught in thought for most of the night and they could tell something was wrong, but I just feigned fatigue. When we were eating at Denny’s, I went back into my old routine were I couldn’t even look him in the eye.
Parked in front of his house, Wii made a comment about me playing Jeanne D’Arc if I was going to stay up late again that night, to which I responded with some passive aggressive tactic and off he went. Pudgy went with him to get his phone. As I was waiting, I turned up the volume and got lost in the music.
Driving back, Pudgy asked me what was wrong cause it sure wasn’t tiredness. I stumbled over my words trying to find a way to not sound like a woman about it, but the bottom line was that I was hurt that he completely shot down my idea. It’s hard enough to build up the courage to even suggest it. It’s why I don’t bother asking him to do stuff with me because I know he’s picky about shit. But whenever he asks me to do stuff, I’m always supportive. I know it shouldn’t bother me because that’s the way him and Pudgy are together. They basically operate on peer pressure until the other person caves in. The problem with me though is that I’m not like that at all because I feel like I’m imposing.
All I know is that today was a tear fest. But I got a good amount of eye candy in. Got through 10 episodes and 4 of the 7 he’s in. So far no gay suggestions but at least him and Ephram are friends. He comes off as sort of a stuck up loner jerk but he’s just too cute for me to hate. He’s just so adorably tragic. I searched on Youtube for any clips but I didn’t find anything so I figure I’ll compile his clips together and upload it for the masses. I got my Craig/John-Paul and Luke/Noah fix from kind people who have taken the time to compile those. Figure I could do the same for someone who is late and curious, just like I was. Had second thoughts about it cause it would seem pedo-ish of me to compile these scenes of a “15 year old kid.” But he’s legal so it’s all good. And anyway, it’s more so for myself than anything.
Gotta love eye candy.
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