Old Friends and Fortune Cookies

I saw him this past Wednesday.

I made the drive over to his work; Balboa Ave all the way west towards Pacific Beach. I parked about 3 or 4 blocks away. He met me there outside of the office and we walked over towards Fatburger. He walked in front while I followed him. I noticed his hooded jacket, his dark blue jeans, and what looked to be a pair of new brown graffiti flat slip-ons. I didn’t say much until we got back to the office. My throat was running dry. Maybe from the lack of nutrients, or could it have been my nerves. Maybe it was because it was the day after I told him. Whatever it was for some reason I couldn’t get comfortable.

We sat there alone in the office, computers lined up against a wall, newspapers scattered about, books and files on the shelves in no particular order. We talked about a multitude of things, or rather he did. I merely provided an ear. Nothing about what we discussed the night prior. It was, a little upsetting I guess. Now that it’s out in the open, are we not supposed to talk about it?

His kindness. I loved and hated that about him. He spoke of how weird it was for me to shower him with stuff while I went through my period of obsessive affection. He told me back then to stop buying him stuff but I didn’t. I thought I was justified. I thought that he would see that I had him in mind. I now realize what a terrible approach that was in a desperate attempt to try and console his seemingly distraught mind. But he never treated me any differently. Despite the multiple fuck ups and awkward situations I created, he never acted differently towards me.

Sometimes I wish he would have. I wanted to get yelled at. Just some sign that I was getting through to him, even if it was negatively. At least then I would have been able to careen off that spell I had cast on myself instead of clinging at hope that one day I’d be more than just an acquaintance, more than a friend even.

I guess the universe, or the Chinese, wish to remind me that things aren’t so dismal. I’ve vocalized my opinion on the decline of fortune cookies and yesterday night, I happened to acquire one of the good ones:

Anime Expo 2007

This trip ended up being less about anime and more about taking pictures of cute and interesting guys I found attractive. So much fun. I didn't have it in me to ask these guys myself so I had a friend ask them for me. One day I'll build up the nerve. So, allow me to be superficial for a bit as I run through the polaroids.


He was one of the first ones I saw when we walked in. He looked cute in person but I think this photo borderlines hot. Sexy almost.


These boys had a sign up that said "Yaoi for pay." I thought it was pretty hilarious. I didn't get a good look at their faces but the humor made them interesting.


After running around outside for a bit to check on the cosplayers, I went back down to the exhibition floor to go scope out some other attractive people. By chance I bumped into this guy. He tapped me on the shoulder and said "You're Kaleb's friend right? It's me. His brother. Yea, I'd notice that punk rock look of yours anywhere." It took me awhile to remember his name and who he was because he seriously didn't look like the same person. Almost as if he had gotten older, or skinnier. I don't know, something changed. But it tripped me out that he recognized me and remembered who I was.


I don't know what it was about this guy. He just sort of attracted me.


I saw him walking around the floor and I wanted to stop him to get a picture of him, but circumstantially I couldn't. But by chance I saw him again and caught the opportunity. Looking at him now, he has an oddly shaped nose, but I swear, in person there's a certain aura about him that was pretty compelling. I also liked the color and cut of his hair.


I met this guy on a forum. It was pretty casual and I actually haven't heard from him in a while. I wanted to get in contact with him prior to leaving so we could meet up maybe, but I didn't know how to get through to him fast enough. By chance I saw him walking by and he just stood out. He's really tall and much more attractive in person. Shame that I couldn't spend more time together with him.

So yea, I have a thing for white guys these days. It used to be Asians before so who knows what it will be in the future.